What is Our Focus?

It would seem that people love pets, don't they?  Cats, . . . Dogs, . . . Birds, . . .  Fish, . . .  Just walk into any pet store, for that matter, and look at all the things we can buy for our pets:  food, toys, treats, pet beds, grooming supplies, collars, leashes, cages, etc., etc., etc.  Part of the reason why people love their pets is because pets are fascinating, aren't they?  Take my dog, for example.   I notice that he is focused on one thing and one thing only:  FOOD.  Well, that and playing.  Whether it's inside the house or sitting outside on the deck, he loves to play "fetch."  Whether it is with a tennis ball or a beat-up old frisbee or one of his stuffed animals, he loves for me to throw the toy and then he runs as fast as he can and brings it back to me so that I can throw it again.  Trust me, he will play this game as long as you let him.  He loves it.  And if you watch him he never takes his eyes off the toy as you are getting ready to throw it.  He has his gaze totally focused on that toy in front of him.  And what happens when I throw it?  Of course, he follows right after it as fast as he can.  He does this because he is focused on that toy.  He won't take his gaze off of it.

We are like that sometimes, it seems to me.  We stay focused on things and won't take our "gaze" off of what we are fixated on.  In the scenario described above with the dog being focused on the toy, we know that the dog is not focused on anything else at all at that precise moment.  The toy . . . or the bone . . . or the tennis ball . . .  is his entire focus at that particular moment.  But, again, we are like that sometimes, aren't we?  For example, let's say a friend lets us down.  Lets say this friend does more than simply let us down.  Lets say this friend really hurts us deeply.  Do we get mad?  More than likely.   Do we get hurt?  Of course.  But the question really isn't if we get angry or if we get hurt.  You see, "Anger" is an emotion.  Being "Hurt" is a feeling.  As human beings, we all get angry.  We all get hurt at times.  Same as we all get happy . . . we all get sad . . . we all get tired . . . we all get joyful . . .  we all get afraid.   We all have emotions.  We all have feelings.  If we go all the way back to the Old Testament book of Genesis way back in Genesis 3:10, we hear the the very effect of Adam's sin was that he felt afraid:  "And (Adam) said, I heard Thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, . . .  " And we, just like Adam, experience feelings and emotions depending on the circumstances and our moods, etc.  Adam was afraid.  We get afraid.  We also get angry.  We also get mad, etc.  So the point then becomes  what do we do when we get angry?  How do we act when we get disappointed?   Many people when they get angry they end up dwelling on that anger and more specifically they focus on the cause of that anger.  It's like the proverbial "snowball:"  our anger when we are mad keeps getting bigger and bigger and bigger  . . . . The problem with emotions such as anger and rage and bitterness, etc. is that they actually do more harm to you than they do to the person that you are angry with.

Let's use a very simple example.  Suppose I am driving to work on a nice sunny morning.  And all the sudden out of nowhere someone cuts in front of me in traffic causing me to swerve and almost hitting me.  In the process I spill my coffee all over my brand new shirt.  So now I am angry.  I'm angry that my car almost got hit and I'm angry that my brand new shirt has a big coffee stain all over it.  Or how about the example of when you get into an argument with a friend or a neighbor or a coworker.  You get into an argument, exchange words, and you leave angry.  Now, again, just like  previously when we described emotions and we said everybody has them.  We really could say the same thing about accidents and arguments as well, couldn't we?  Everybody has them every now and then.  Nobody wants to have an accident.  They aren't done on purpose.  This is why we call them as "accident," right?  Nobody wants to get into an argument.  But they happen every now and then.  But again the question becomes what do we do when someone cuts us off in traffic?  What do we do when get into a fight?   What do we do when someone treats us wrong and treats us like dirt?

Let's face it, so often when we are mad or when we are angry, we focus on that anger.  We think about the person we got into a fight with and in our mind we relive the argument over and over and over again.  Each time we think about new things we could have said . . .  new insults we could have given.  Or the person that cuts us off in traffic.  We think of the things that we would like to do to that person.  Again, it seems to me that getting angry is not necessarily the problem . . . getting angry is not really the issue.  Remember, anger is an emotion, first and foremost.  We all have emotions.  Therefore sometimes we will get angry in life.  But then question becomes what do we do with our anger?  Remember the image of the dog that we discussed earlier?  When the dog focuses on a bone or focuses on a toy that I am holding in front of him, his entire attention is focused on that ball, on that toy, on that bone.  In other words, everything else is blocked out at that specific moment.  He is just focused solely on the bone or toy held in front of him.  Same way for us sometimes in regards to our fear, . . . our anger . . . our bitterness,  . . . etc.   We totally become focused on our anger and the reason for our anger, for example.  Again, it's not that we got angry to begin with so much as we "choose" to be angry after that and "dwell" on our anger for an extended period of time.

And the longer we let anger, bitterness, jealousy, etc. boil up inside of us, the more harm it does to US.  The person that I am mad at probably doesn't even know that I am mad.  Or at the very least that person doesn't know the extent of how furious I am.  And so the point is the same:  when I am angry . . . or more accurately, when I choose to stay angry . . . . I cause more harm to myself than to the person I am angry with.  When I hate someone, I cause more harm to myself than the person I choose to hate.

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment.  He that feareth is not made perfect in love." (I St. John 4:18)

When we do get angry, for example, we need to take time out and acknowledge that we are angry, yes, but we need to take it a step further.  We need to recognize WHY we are angry.   For example, are we mad solely because we got into a fight or is it more accurate to say that we are angry because we got into a fight with someone that we like or love?  More than likely, we are more hurt by getting into squabbles with people that we love than when we get into arguments with people we do not know.  If we are out in the store and a complete stranger is rude to us, we typically simply move on.  We may notice, yes, that the person is being rude but beyond that we typically don't let it affect us.  But contrast that when someone we love or someone we call a friend is rude to us.  It's going to bother us much more.  So in that example, we would state that we are angry because the person we got angry with is someone we love or like a great deal.

"For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear: but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father." (Romans 8:15)

If we are going to get "focused" on anything, let us get "focused" on the fact that God loves us and He is our loving Father.  As Christians, let us get "fixated" on the fact that God has a plan for each one of us.  Let us "focus" on what God would have us do each and every day.  As Christians, let us "focus" on staying away from sin as much as possible.  God loves us.   He loves all of us.  The rest is up to us how "we" respond to His invitation.  How do "we" respond to His call?  Do "we" ignore Him and focus on what "we" want in life?  Or do "we" choose to live for Him on a daily basis?  The choice really is up to us.  We have to choose in life what we get "focused" on.